Thursday, 9 February 2012

Carlton Palmer is a Wanker


Does anyone actually like him? I'm putting forward the simple arguement of 'no'. Reasons -

As a Hartlepool United fan, we don't like him as he wound up club legend and hero Brian Honour in a FA Cup match in 1993. After he'd kicked Wor Jackie into the air then accused him of diving and being a 'cheating little shite', he proceeded to make his mouth go constantly - comments such as 'I'm getting paid two grand for this match, how do you get by?', 'this summer I was playing for England, what were you doing?' and similar taunts led to fellow Sheff Wed team mates Trevor Francis and Danny Wilson telling him to 'shut it' and 'stop being a prick'. So he's hated by Poolies one and all.

But it's not just us surely. He was part of an unfashionable George Graham Leeds United, so they can't be fond. And was relegated at Coventry and Nottingham Forest - again they can't be keen? Even his previous managers have had digs at him. Big Ron (manager at WBA, Sheff Wed & Forest) famously said 'Carlton can trap a ball further than I can kick it'. There was a similar theme Southampton, where Dave Jones said "He covers every blade of grass out there, but that's only because his first touch is so crap". He also noted that in the dressing room was "abrasive, awkward and argumentative" - university speak for 'twat'.

All England fans will remember Graham Taylors ill fated regime were work rate and doggedness was rated over flair and skill. Therefore Palmer was included in the England squad that flopped at Sweden 92 and failed to reach USA 94, winning 18 caps during these dark days in English football.

He's potentially hated even more as a manager. At Stockport County he led his troops to lose ten out of his opening 11 games in 2001. Relegation form surely? Yep. The Hatters went down to division two and proceeding to win only eight in their first 22 in the Football League's middle tier. He was sacked in Sept. 2003 and problems have continued at Stockport since.

Despite this he managed to get another manager's job, this time at Mansfield Town in 2004-05. Poor form yet again led to abuse from the fans and he walked with the Stags in the relegation zone. Another team Palmer successfully guided to failure. He still wasn't satisfied with what he had achieved (namely pissing the Mansfield fans off) and went back, as a TV pundit for a live cup match with Boro, to do what he did best (namely piss Mansfield fans off further) by openly critiscisng their star player of the day (name escapes me, possibly Simon Brown?) saying he lacked desire and commitment - something Palmer himself was short of when he resigned as manager of Mansfield because the fans were singing a few nasty songs.

Finally he gets in bathtubs with football fans in the name of betting. Not pleasant behaviour.

In short a bit of a nobhead. In tall, a bit of a tall nobhead.

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